Conversation with Hassan 1: An Introduction

Today I met with Hassan for the first time. While I would not say I was nervous about the meeting, going to have a conversation with someone that I had been essentially matched up with was an odd feeling. This is not to say that I am not excited about having the opportunity to get to know a foreign exchange student, but I felt somewhat out of place knowing that our interaction had been essentially initiated by a third party.

When Hassan first began to speak I quickly realized that my decision to hold our meeting at the Union Grounds Café in the BLUU was a poor choice as I did not take into account that the loud music and sound of bustling students was not conducive to holding a conversation with a person who is still learning English, as at times Hassan was quite hard to hear. However, despite the somewhat less than ideal environment, Hassan and I had a great conversation. We began by just breaking the ice and telling each other about ourselves discussing such things like our hometowns and hobbies, but the topics were kept very surface level. Two things that I made sure to emphasize to Hassan was how much respect I had for him for leaving the home he has known for his whole life and coming to a place with a different culture, values, and language, and also that I truly wanted to help him in any way that I could.

After some more small talk when we were discussing Hassan’s parents, Hassan had a question that he clearly wanted to ask me, but also seemed very nervous as he did not want to offend me. However, after assurance that I would take no offense, Hassan asked why children in America so quickly leave their homes when they go off to college and never come back to help their parents, even when they are old. He mentioned the example of one of his IEP teachers who is in her seventies and has no one to care for her, and he said that to do such a thing in Saudi Arabia would be unthinkable, and that the children would always care for their parents. I admittedly had trouble coming up with an answer for this question, as there really is no good reason other than cultural differences. This was the first major cultural difference that we had uncovered through our conversation, and it was quite impactful due to the fact that Hassan was so perplexed about something that is considered the norm in our society, as it is the opposite of the values of his country. I actually consider this one small portion of the conversation very important because it served as a reminder to myself of the fact that even though we are both students at TCU that in some respect share commonalities, due to the stark differences of the cultures we were raised in many vast differences also exist. Furthermore, the discussion of this topic also reinforced the great opportunity that I have to meet with Hassan because of our cultural differences. Having lived in the same area of the world my entire life, I feel that it is quite easy to get lost in the “bubble” of a small geographic area and become blind to the outside world. However, my conversations with Hassan will be a great opportunity to include diversity in my life as I learn about him and his culture.

Another topic of conversation that I found important, as well as a bit humorous, happened as Hassan asked me what the logic was behind the phrase “as cute as a button”, and much like the discussion about family norms I was speechless. After laughing a fair amount about the ridiculousness of the literal statement, I realized that another benefit to my future meetings with Hassan would be the ability to obtain a deeper understanding of the English language by viewing the language from the perspective of a learner. Specifically, being a native English speaker there are many things that I say regularly yet could not clearly define if asked, so I think being forced to think about the meaning behind the specific vocabulary I use will be very beneficial.

Overall, I had a great first conversation with Hassan as our discussions spanned both small talk and more in-depth topics, and I look forward to learning more about him as the semester progresses.